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The Lord Will Provide 22nd August, 2007

Posted by Scotty in JUC, Support.
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The Lord provides, right? Scripture is clear on that one. Repeatedly we read stories about God’s provision for His people Israel, we read of God’s blessing on the good and the bad alike, we read Christ’s words in the Sermon on the Mount that God provides for us, as He reassures us by describing God’s provision for plants and animals!

online_loan.jpgWalking this journey is a serious test of my faith. I am constantly debating in my head. At the start of the summer, I was offered a loan… interest free. I was told that I could borrow £3000 and we would negotiate when it would need to be paid back. I looked at my almost empty bank account and began to process through what this loan would mean.

“I need £6,000 to be in Israel for the semester”
“God said He’ll provide”
“Is this loan God’s way of providing?”
“Or… is it really trusting God’s provision if I take the loan?”

I have debated and debated and debated.
A few days ago, as I sat across from a great Man of God, we began to talk about the journey ahead. He was asking me how long I had left. Answer = 2weeks. He asked me how much of the money I had. Answer=£2,000. He asked me how much concert had done. Answer = it only made half the amount it did last year. He asked me my plan to get the rest of the money. Answer = I dunno.

We then ventured onto my “last resort”… the loan. I began to explain the situation:
I have been offered a loan, and I’m so grateful that it has been offered to me. But… God told me He would provide for me, and getting in debt doesn’t feel like trust. I have the offer of the loan there, but I really feel like I’ll be stepping on the aeroplane as the last amount for Israel is being given to me. In my case, I feel God has been really clear that He will provide, and so I need to rest in that promise. So… I’m waiting, extremely nervously for God to “do His thing”. All the while, feeling comforted by the fact that if the money doesn’t come in the way I’m imagining, the loan is always there for “safety”.

The next part of the conversation was not expected in the slightest. My good friend, a really mature Christian Man whom I respect deeply, told me that I should not take the loan! My stomach started churning, because I knew that God was speaking through him. The conversation changed a little. This man is in the habit of supporting ministry endeavours, and whenever he gives a donation he always does it in cash as opposed to cheque because that was it remains anonymous and God gets all the glory!

The next sentence blew me away:
“In your case its going to have to be different, because it would be silly to hand you £2500 in cash. Will a cheque be ok?”

I thought I had misheard and so had to get him to clarify what he was saying. I had to look away as my eyes began to well up. It was all I do to whisper in my head “Thank you God. But why?”

It was not a question of ingratitude, but a statement of inadequacy. God has worked really clearly in my life. Those who know me and read my blog will testify that about me. But I’m so aware of my flaws. I’m extremely familiar with the fact that I repeatedly screw up. Daily I find myself doing things that are dishonouring to God. Moment by moment my sinful human nature takes control and I sin. And yet in spite of all the things I do that break my Father’s heart, He continues to love me and pour His blessings over me.

images.jpgIn that moment I repented of the moments where I lacked faith in God’s provision, restated my faith in the Lord Who Provides, and thanked God for His work in my life.

Thank you Lord. I love you.

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Comments»

1. sarah kinsman - 29th August, 2007

wow, you have no idea how much this blog means to me right now. I’m going through a very similar situation and i actually prayed just this morning for God to give me more faith, because I feel like I’m lacking and I really need it right! Thanks so much for the encouragement! Our God knows!


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